April 17, 1993

Lesson #9: Promoting Relationships

A wise person doesn't try to fix another person. They love others just as they are now,accepting their level of growth. Definitely here on your planet there are so many levels of understandings.
How do you get along and appreciate the differences? How will you learn to speak freely and with ease to such a variety of people? By simply loving them, by simply appreciating them, and by simply enjoying them.
You are the ones who will change. Yes, no matter how hard you try or how badly you want others to change, this simply will not happen by your volition. Take up the love of yourself and put your efforts into changing yourself. Attempting to change someone is the prime example of going about something backwards. Who can you change,no one but yourself. That is why setting a good example is so powerful. Others see, they watch with admiration, and they want to act this way. They will want these actions in their life.
To be an effective person, who can live with your brothers and sisters in harmony, then you have to look to your own growth. You change. This is your duty. This is your work. Setting out to change another will only create barriers between you.
To keep the walls from forming, don't give advice unless you are asked. Even so, if you are asked for advice, the other person has the prerogative of freewill choice, if they will even take it. Don't be disappointed if they go about solving their problems as they ,feel it is right, in their heart. Others will do what is comfortable and meaningful for themselves. This is as it should be. Conformity in this sense is not creative, but by accepting your role to change yourself and letting others take up their role in acting in their own behalf, everyone grows. Each person takes what they can and puts it into their own action. They change themselves.
Now when we ask you to go about your duties together, these differences will be helpful. There will be differences of opinions and diversity in speaking these opinions if you chance to agree.
When going about your missionary work, appreciation of these differences will help you in speaking out but finding a common ground to agree on.
You all agree on values. do you not? ,Faith in God, is valuable to each. Faith makes our lives bearable. We have faith in God's way as being the best way to go. It is better to live under God's sheltering protection than to be lost on the high seas of aggression all alone. In sharing about your ,faith,, each person had a different statement. No two explanations were alike but they were from your very own experiences of ,having faith., Who would say any were wrong? It is your experience as you see it.
We as teachers let your ideas of faith grow. We would tell you to look again at faith in Urantia. Not to prove you wrong but to help you state your idesa more clearly. Faith can be shared with many believers. It is valuable. We would ask you to enlarge on your ideas. Yes, add to what you already know.
When you can get along in the group with your fellow members, you can get along with just about anyone. Here we wish to caution you when it relates to all mankind. Never think you will harmonize with all mortals, for this is a fantasy. Give yourself a break here and accept what you can do and allow that to be the criteria for the mission. We don't expect the impossible nor would we put this burden on you. Of course, we are mainly referring to the outreach work.
Allow this to be as a matter of what is. Praise the differences, as then you can be sure freewill is present and active.
People have chosen to be as they are in attitudes. When the flood tides of adversity fall upon you, each will take a look at the situation and either grow and go on with life, or they will stay stuck in the situation. Their life will be about this event. They will rehash and rehash this event as if it has just happened. These people will be stuck and won't move on to growth. They can hardly be effective. It is paramount to rid yourself of all the hurts, fears and pains from the past. Let them go.
Do take good care of yourself and face your fears daily. Do look at ,why, or ,what, you fear and let it go by placing it in the Father's hands. Let the Father help as he willingly waits to do this. The Father wants you placed in situations of learning so you will grow strong and agile by depending on him.
You can bend and straighten up again. You need not be afraid to bend with the flow. All mortals see that to be too stern in your own ideas and ways will only set yourself up for disappointments. What will be important is that the group learns to bend and cede to the best way to proceed. Many times you see your ideas and only your ideas as right. Allow yourself to have opinions and also to know that these ideas can change.
Do you see here of what we speak?
We as your teachers are in the same situations. One teacher will believe one thing while others think another way is best. We finally harmonize by accepting and going along with the majority. Group wisdom can evolve too. This is good. Yes, it's very good. It shows you are alive,you are taking action. You are learning as you teach.
At our stage in growth, even we have disappointments and disagreements, although we have developed the ability to discuss freely by putting the self aside. The work to be done and how to objectively achieve it is most desirable,our first, foremost duty. Here too we adjust our thoughts after our experiences when we see it does not work. When another way would be better and is actually working, we change our methods. We would be foolish to do otherwise but change the plan.
It is not a mistake if it doesn't work,doesn't produce results. Have faith in this wise counsel. Rethink how to proceed. Fearing to take action only delays learning from experience. When you do the job, you begin to see what you need to learn.
You will want to apply the better way so you are more able to do the job well. This process will accumulate in self- confidence that will help you by experiencing, learning and accepting.
Try stepping out of your old modes and stepping up to the adventure of spreading the words about our Father. We are not expecting you to be bolder in a foolish way. We are asking you to step forward in the Father's love. Let love of service show you the way. You will see opportunities where you can speak up.
You know much. You have stored up much knowledge in these many years of studying The Urantia Book. Let us go about our stepping forward with the ease of knowing and the ability to do the work. You have nothing to fear but fear itself. All is well. All is going according to plan.
Consider this and keep it close to your heart. All of us are learning together. Yes, we have knowledge of teaching. Yes you have a great amount of knowledge from Urantia. Now let us help you teach this information to your waiting fellow mortals who are so needy. Mortals who truly are in strife and pain. These are your brothers and sisters who need your help.
Need we say more?
As we depart for the event, be good enough to be by our side. Place us in your thoughts. We too are like you. We love adventures. We love serving. We love giving comfort. We love each of you dearly. ,A & O